STRATOVARIUS

I'm not sure exactly when STRATOVARIUS's life turned into a reality TV show, but having tuned into this Finnish equivalent of a soap opera one day, I was surprised to discover that half the musicians, including Timo Kotipelto, had been discarded, while the hefty boss Tolkki was loudly and prolongedly going through a midlife crisis. Moreover, in previous episodes — as I gathered — a creature of the quarrelsome persuasion had appeared, who in less than a quarter managed to plant a thorny cactus of discord within the band, antagonize the international community of dolphin enthusiasts, and generate record traffic for the tabloid Blabbermouth.net. In dismay, I yanked the TV out of the socket. Plugged it back in a couple months later — the old crew was reassembled, a new album was on the horizon, and users were cautiously scratching their heads, apprehensively reading about planned "radical changes." Isn't it too soon? I expected, at the very least, another 25 stab wounds to the head and a homosexual scandal. Still, on the way to the black-and-gold impostor, the musicians did give the journalistic pencils something to scratch about — when the political officers at Sanctuary, trembling over their budgets, demanded the removal of the song "Hitler" from the album. Besides its Promethean title, the composition was stuffed with samples from the Fuhrer's live PR campaigns. Hitting the nail right on the head, as they say. After a brief ideological war, the commercial imperative defeated the creative one — the silenced leader of the Third Reich was hidden behind the neutral title "Gotterdammerung (Zenith Of Power)." And so, in early September, the ill-fated "Stratovarius" saw the light of day — a seasoned, well-crafted disc in every respect, with soft hard-rock melodics and endless credits on the liner notes. The first song, "Maniac Dance," embodied those very "radical changes" that longtime fans had feared. It's slower, more electronic than traditional STRATOVARIUS. It's simply different — yet while it was perfectly suited for the eponymous single, it fits into the album rather awkwardly. Starting with "Fight!!!," the conviction that "Maniac Dance" was merely a glitch at the disc-stamping factory only grows from song to song. What follows is the familiar, well-known STRATOVARIUS, with their now-trademarked nimble minor-key choruses and other recognizable moves. The pleasant tenor against sweet cellos in "Back To Madness" is an extra lyrical plus. The reworking of the Finnish folk song "The Land Of Ice And Snow" is beyond all praise. However, the drawn-out straightforwardness of the ill-fated "Gotterdammerung," the cheap pathos of "United," the deliberate softness of "Fight!!!" (which loses handily to the song of the same name by GAMMA RAY) — all this is a reminder that the era of 100% hit-filled albums has passed. Probably with the Fuhrer on backing vocals, this disc would have sounded more interesting.